Just Try to Understand

As I near closer and closer to the 6 week countdown, I have really been reflecting on just how much crap pregnant women put up with.  There are so many sacrifices to be made, so many changes to your body that you have absolutely no control over.  And every woman is different, so even if you've personally been through it before, you can't totally relate to what someone else might be going through (or at least I don't feel like I can totally relate.)

I have decided that the saying is true - A woman becomes a mother at the moment that she finds out she's pregnant.  A man becomes a father at some point after that.  Maybe it's early on in the pregnancy, maybe it's not until the final weeks, and for many, if not most, maybe it's not until the child is actually here (hopefully it happens at that point.)  A woman immediately needs to start making sacrifices.  She needs to start making major changes in her lifestyle, diet, habits, and so many other things.  Men don't need to do that.  If they'd like, they can just go on with their lives as if nothing at all has changed, when it reality so much has changed that it's mind boggling.  Nearly a full year can pass before the father has to admit that things might have to change. 

The list that I've created below is just a sample of the things that I have thought over the past 8 months when I really feel like my husband (or sometimes other people around me) doesn't understand how hard this whole thing can be on me.  As much as they might try, I'm convinced that men will just never understand.  I'm guessing that I am not the first person to feel this way, and I certainly won't be the last, but if there are any male readers out there - particularly if you don't have any kids yet - keep some of these things in mind as you try to be the best support person your significant other could ever hope for.

You might think that having to "put up" with us during this period of time is challenging enough, but do you think you would be willing to make so many changes to your life at the drop of a hat? It's crazy to think that women do it all the time.

Just try to understand, and remember that..... 
  • You don't throw up when you think about or eat food.
  • You don't throw up when you don't eat food.
  • You're allowed to eat deli meat.
  • You can still stand for more than an hour without being in pain.
  • You can still drink alcohol.
  • You can go on carnival rides.
  • You don't feel left out on all of the fun.
  • You can still consume caffeine in mass quantities if you want.
  • You can still drink diet sodas without worrying whether or not the chemicals are going to hurt your child.
  • Your hip bones are not spreading.
  • You're not trying to sleep on your side, when all you really want is to sleep on your back.
  • Your arms and legs don't go numb if you do sleep on your back. 
  • Your skin is not stretching to point of tearing.    
  • You don't have stretch marks.
  • Your belly button is an innie, and it intends to stay that way.
  • You can bend over at the waist without extreme discomfort.
  • You have a waist.
  • You can put your own shoes on.
  • You can see your feet.
  • Your legs aren't swollen.
  • Your clothes still fit.
  • You're not gaining weigh at an unprecedented rate.
  • Your doctor isn't calling you a fatty. 
  • Your chest isn't expanding.
  • Your chest isn't tender and sore.
  • You are not being kicked by a creature inside of you.
  • You do not have to deal with waking up from aforementioned creature's nightly hiccups.
  • You don't have to go to the bathroom every hour.
  • You can make it through the night without waking up to go to the bathroom four times.
  • You don't have massive amounts of hormones raging through your body.
  • You're not emotional and overly sensitive. 
  • Your nose hasn't been permanently stuffed up for the past 9 months. 
  • Your lungs, stomach, and abdomen are properly positioned in your abdomen.
  • You can eat a normal sized meal without feeling like you're going to explode.
  • You're not constantly tired.  
  • You're not carrying around an extra 30 pounds of weight in your abdomen. 
  • You don't have to push a bowling out an extremely sensitive area of your body. 
  • People don't constantly comment on your weight. 
Ladies - what else would you add? 


Suzi said...

Ok, so I definitely CANNOT disagree with anything in your itemized list here. And I KNOW from one of your recent posts that you are not taking the pregnancy for granted, but I'll tell you this: you will be AMAZED at how quickly none of these items will matter much anymore when you see the sight of your little guy. :)

Jenny W. said...

**Men will never understand the feeling when a complete stranger feels the need to touch your belly. SO WEIRD!!!
**Lisa, I'll be looking for an addendum to this list after you experience the birthing process as to why men will never understand pregnancy, labor, giving birth and how you feel after giving birth. Love the list, spot on!

Lynette said...

Can so relate to your list! Men will also never completely understand why a foot massage feels sooooo good! I agree with Suzi though, how quickly you forget all these things the first time you look into your baby's eyes. You will never feel so much love! Good luck! Went to the doctor today and I also have 2 weeks....he told me to pack my bags and feel free to go into labor anytime now!!!

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