I'm his mommy

Yesterday, Murphy had a seizure. He had put his two little paws on my arm and looked at me with sad eyes and I gently pushed him away, seconds before he starting convulsving uncontrollably. We pulled over in a gas station parking lot and laid him in the grass, where he could convulse without witting anything in the car. D stroked his back and quietly said things like, "It's ok, good boy, you're going to be ok" while I got on the phone with my mom to find out if St. Marys had an emergency vet service.

(Murphy, on his namesake holiday)

But I'm getting ahead of myself, so let me give you the background story.

We were headed back to Pittsburgh from St. Marys after a quick overnight visit. Murph had had a rough weekend. As soon as we arrived in St. Marys on Saturday, he ran into the house and gobbled down all of Riley's dog food. The bowl was full and Murphy has definitely been known to get sick when he eats too fast, even when it's the food that he's used to eating. After that was a day full of a sick dog. He was restless when we tried to take a nap that afternoon, and ran to the water bowl as soon as we opened the bedroom and drank more water than he should reasonbly consume. Not long after, he threw up slimy water - something that often happens when he drinks too much too fast. I figured that he was feeling dehyrated from eating so much a short while earlier.

Later that night when we were at my aunt's, he wouldn't eat the treats that they tried to give him (very unlike him), and threw up and/or pooped on their floor (it was such a weird mess that I honestly couldn't tell what it was - ew.) The next morning we were preparing to leave. Because of his antics the day and night before, we didn't give him any of his own dog food - I figured he would just throw it up.

At one point shortly before we were going go leave, a large unknown dog came to the card and started sniffing around. Murphy went CRAZY! He hates other animals in his territory and barked and whined like crazy. He stood on his hind legs to try to look out the window when he couldn't see the other dog from the front door.

I did some research on dogs and seizures last night. It turns out that many small dogs can experience seizures when they're hypoglycemic (tranlation - low blood sugar.) This makes sense in many ways because we knew that Murphy had thrown up everything that he ate the day before and he hadn't had any other food that morning. We, however, thought that it might be related to a pinch nerve or something wrong with his back, since his two previous seizures had both occurred when he was jumping onto or of of our bed (which is quite high and difficult for Murph to do.)

In my research, I also read that dogs typically can feel that a seizure is about to happen. They frequently frantically seek out their owner for comfort and love right before it happens. Reading that only broke my heart more when I remembered that Murph had put his paws on my arm and looked at me with sad eyes right before it happened. I pushed him away, thinking that he wanted to crawl on my lap to look out the window. Really, he was coming to me for help, because he knew something bad and scary was about to happen but didn't know what else to do. Soooo sad.

Whatever the cause, the whole incident was heartbreaking. We often refer to Murph as our "little one." He is - for all intents and purposes - our child, and we are mommy and daddy. He is the one thing in our lives other than ourselves that we care for, that we have to be responsible for. And when it appears that we fail at that, it's devastating. I know that at some point in our lives, when we have children, Murph - our dog - will be just that; a dog. He will take second stage to a human, but right now, he's all that we have. I am his mommy, and he knows that I love him unconditionally.

Murphy's seizure really put things into perspective for us. We realized that D is the calm one, and I am the one who panics (I probably could have called that one without this incident though.) We realized how much we love that little dog, and how sad we would be if he died. We also realized that St. Marys has inadequate emergency pet care (although I could have predicted that one as well.) If your pet has a medical emergency in St. Marys, you have to take him to State College. STATE COLLEGE - an hour and a half away!!! Plenty of time for your dog to die.

Dogs - unlike children - only live for a dozen or so years, give or take a few depending on the breed, which leads to a lot more heartache for those of us who love our pets like they're our children. Which means that we'll do ANYTHING for them, even if it means exorbitant vet bills to try to figure out why they're suddenly suffering from seizures. For now, I'm just glad that he's ok.