Little Sister's Wedding

(My apologies to my Facebook friends who are also blog readers, as you are going to see the same pictures here that you already saw on Facebook. Sorry!)

I already showed you the flowers that I did for my sister's wedding last weekend (which I actually really enjoyed doing!) but since I was also sort of the photographer as well, (or, at least, one of a few people who were taking pictures) I wanted to post a few more pictures from the festivities!

Walking down the aisle

The ceremony was your standard Catholic wedding mass.  And maybe it's not a standard part of Catholic weddings anyway (I can't recall when the last Catholic wedding that I attended was), but the priest never said "You may kiss the bride!"

The sort of awkward expressions on their faces in the picture above are them thinking, "Is he going to say it??" and then realizing it wasn't going to happen.

In front of the church

Afterwards there was a small reception gathering at my parents house, where desserts, cheese, fruit, chips and salsa and drinks were served.  There were a few brief speeches, and then all of the bridesmaids were given wine glasses with our names on them.

The day was incredibly cold for May, but it didn't rain, and that's really what counts.  Trust me when I say that in every outdoor picture you see, I wish I was wearing a sweater, and I was always throwing it off at the last second.

We tried to take some family shots sans children, but EH decided he that he wanted to be a part of these pictures, and refused to walk away (he also refused to give up the num-num, which he is usually not allowed to have during the day - I don't actually know who gave that to him, or if he just randomly found it.)  Anyway, that's why everyone is laughing in the photo below.  I like to think of this as EH's first photobomb.

So we finally gave in and decided children could join in on the photo.

The sky was overcast, but that made for nice pictures without a lot of shadows or squinting, since it wasn't bright!  All in all it was a good day, and in a few weeks we'll be at it again when they have their larger reception for friends and extended family!

Making Your Own Wedding Bouquets

I think I found my new calling: Wedding Coordinator. 

This past weekend was my sister's wedding, and I was a bridesmaid, florist, and photographer.  I was most excited about doing the flowers because I knew it would be something that I would enjoy doing.  She chose hydrandea's and after watching a 5 minute YouTube video on making hydrangea bouquets, I was ready for the challenge.

Making your own wedding bouquets is much simpler than you might originally think, especially if you're using full, fluffy flowers. 

The bouquets turned out lovely, and I didn't even need any of the accessory ribbon that I purchased to decorate them a bit.

The only bad thing about these bouquets is that hydrangea's are apparently very thirsty flowers, and can't go for long without water.  I make these in the morning and left the stems long so that we could put them in water until right before we left.  I cut the stems down to about an inch below the ribbon when we walked out the door.  Three hours later some of the blooms still looked fine, but some of them had really wilted. 

I also did two large altar arrangements for the church, using the hydrangeas and some filler flowers and greens that my sister ordered. 

I thought the large arrangements turned out really nice, but was disappointed that they were place far back on the altar and were barely noticeable unless you knew to look for them. I was thinking that they would be placed more in the forefront, on the steps up to the altar where I've seen flowers placed before, because they really did look nice and deserved to be noticed!

The bouquets were really simple to make, and if anyone is interested, here is all you need:

• 4 to 5 hydrangea stems per bouquet
• 1 wide rubber band per bouquet
• Green floral tape
• Wide satin ribbon
• Pins with pearl heads
• Cool heat hot glue gun

To put together the arrangements:

1. Put your stems together and arrange them the way you want them
2. Put a rubber band at the base of the flowers so that the bouquet stays together
3. Starting at the rubber band, wrap green floral tape around the stems for at least 6 inches (decide how long you want your stems to be for the bouquets before you get to this step)
4. Once the floral tape is in place, put a line of warm glue about a 1/2 inch down from the top of the floral tape and secure your ribbon
5. Wrap the ribbon around the stems, going up first to cover the floral tape, but then heading back down to cover your starting point
6. At the bottom, decide which part of the bouquet is going to be the front
7. On the back of the bouquet then, place another line of glue and secure and cut your ribbon
8. On the front of the bouquet, place a pearl-headed pin down the front, every 1/2 inch or so
9. Place in an inch or so of water until you're ready to use them!

It looks me about 2 and a half hours to make 4 bouquets and 2 large altar arrangements.  If only I had realized my talent before my own wedding, I probably could have saved us a ton of money (although that would have added to my own stress at the time, I'm sure.)

So, now the only question is - What to name my floral design business?

Twisty Slide - Toddler Style

EH is finally at that age where he is super interested in playgrounds.  Going up steps, walking across bridges and going down slides.  ESPECIALLY going down slides.

I thought he might be a little apprehensive about going down slides by himself, but I could not have been more wrong.  He loves it.  Can't get enough of it.  The worst part about going to the park is convincing EH that it's a good time to leave.

I finally understand why the parents of toddlers are always lamenting cold weather and the inability to go outside and play.  Outside is so much fun at this age!

Those Baby Blues

We knew that EH would have blue eyes - after all, both DH and I are blue-eyed beauties.  But what I never really understood was why people are always so quick to remark about blue eyes.

 Well, now I know. 

Take a blue eyed baby, some blue clothing to bring out that eye color, and some bright natural sunlight, and you don't even need Photoshop to make remarkable eyes.

That kid.. he's going to be heartbreaker with those eyes some day...

EH Contractors Inc.

There is so much catching up that I have to do.  Videos and pictures from weeks ago, that are too cute to not share, but getting to be too old to even be relevant anymore.  The problem is that he changes waaaaaay too fast.  Seriously, one day he can't reach the handle of the front and the next day he's not only letting the dog in, but then once DH takes off the leash, EH opens the door again and throws the leash outside.

Where does he learn these things!?!??! I mean, I guess I know where he learns these things, but when was he paying enough attention to actually take it all in and remember it?  He seems like such an ADHD baby most of the time, but clearly that is NOT the case.

So here is the back story on this video.  We would really love to get a king-sized bed, but our bedroom is pretty small and we aren't optimistic that it would fit.  When we first moved into our house, there was a doorway within our bedroom that led to a "back entrance" of sorts to the bathroom.  It was stupid.  So we closed it up and even though right now it's just a trashy wall of purple drywall it has meant that we can now use that space as a real wall, instead of having to honor the existence of a door.

So after some initial measuring I'm pretty sure we didn't come to any conclusive results, EXCEPT knowing for certain that EH found a new toy for the next two weeks or more - the tape measure.

And evidence of his budding, advanced listening skills... the video.

He's Basically an Adult, People!

I'm not sure when the last time was that I posted a video of EH, but I'm pretty sure that compared to the video I'm going to post today, he probably seemed like a total baby.  That's because in today's video he practically seems like an adult.

The boy is going down the twisty slide.  BY HIMSELF.

On one of the smaller slides at the same park he didn't even need help getting up OR going down the slide.  He went up the stairs all on his own, sat down way too far away from the top of slide, shimmied his bum to the slide and then tried to count "one... two... " before going down all by himself.  Most of the time I just stood at the bottom of the slide - he didn't even need me!

Here's the video.


Doesn't he seem SO OLD??!?!

It really is amazing how much he's grown recently.  His vocabulary has increased exponentially, and he knows what he's talking about most of the time - it's a lot less babble than it used to be.

At a play date this past week they had an easter egg hunt for the little kids and even though we didn't think he was old enough to really care, he was SO into picking up the eggs and putting them in his bag whenever we pointed one out to him (he wasn't real great at actually finding them himself.)

Although I've been longing for warmer weather for my own personal reasons, I am now looking forward even more than ever to more park play days and eventually going to the swimming pool.  I can already tell that this summer is going to be blast with EH.  Can someone maybe take EH on his best (non-fussy) day and just freeze him in time for a little bit?  Because this age is just so adorable I finally understand why people say things like "they grow up so quickly."  Before I was always just like, "Ok bud, let's just grow up already, ok?"

Love.

Another Hard Good-Bye

I know I've been MIA from her for a long, long time.... Part of it is because I have been insanely busy at work, and that has meant that I've wanted to avoid my computer at home at all costs.  Part of it is because I've been trying to be healthy again, after yet another hiatus, and that means that the time I used to spend blogging is now spent on the treadmill.

And part of it is because I couldn't write a happy-go-lucky-look-at-the-cute-baby blog post without writing this one first... and this one has been so hard to write, that even just thinking about would bring tears to my eyes and a horrible, huge, painful lump in my throat that I can't seem to swallow away, that I just kept putting it off....

*Sigh*

DH's dad passed away on March 5, 2013.

A Tuesday night... a mere 19 months after his mom's passing.  His dad's death was so fast, and in many ways so unexpected, that I wasn't able to properly prepare and process in the way that an ISTJ personality (don't know what that means? Read more about it/me here) needs to process in order to truly accept something as fact.

On February 2nd we attended DH's dad's surprise 80th birthday party.  My goodness... what thought and planning went into that event. His family went so out of their way, so above and beyond, to create a truly thoughtful and meaningful birthday that they knew their dad would appreciate, that it makes me cry just thinking about it. DH spent hours and hours and hours - in a way that I believe only he can do - to create a slide show of his dad's entire life, with captivating animation, songs that were evaluated for the level of meaning and emotion they evoked, and - because he always has to outdo himself - an intro clip with the look and sound of the 20th Century Fox movie introduction, but with the words "80th Birthday Dad" instead.  My god, could DH be more thoughtful?

That party was incredible.  His family invited everyone and anyone who had ever played a role in his dad's life - family, current friends, colleagues, even college friends.  And the crazy thing? EVERYONE came.  There were so many people there.. people drove from far distances, on a snowy Saturday night to be there. That's how much he impacted their lives.

My greatest regret? I didn't get to spend enough time appreciating the details, watching his dad enjoy this party thrown in his honor, or even interacting with him much at all. After all, I was chasing around an 18 month toddler who just looooved going up and down the 3 stairs that separated the upper level of the banquet room to the lower level.

And after all, I didn't want to take away any of the time that he could spend catching up with some of his long-lost friends... after all, I would have plenty of time to spend with him in the coming days, weeks, months, years, right?

But it turns out that wasn't to be.  In fact, that weekend was the last time that I saw DH's dad, and it breaks my heart to say that... to realize that... especially when I think about how distracted I was that entire weekend with EH there.

We all knew that DH's dad had cancer, and even though it clearly tired him out, and was causing him to lose incredible amounts of weight, he was fighting it, and he was definitely fooling us.  He looked great and he always put on a happy face when we were around. It was remarkable. As far as I was concerned, he was acting exactly how I expected an 80 year old man to behave, in perfect health or not...

After a few week of a trial study drug that didn't seem to be helping, he switched to something new, and the results seemed to be rather remarkable - all of his test results started showing improvements, and he went from needing to have regular blood transfusions to need to feeling all around improved.  So much so that he and his wife went away that first weekend of March to a bed and breakfast weekend that was a gift from all of his many children from Christmas of 2011. 

That following Monday - March 4th - we received an email from his wife that he had started feeling bad over the weekend, and that she would be taking him to see his doctor the next day for evaluation. 


That next day, March 5th, we all received an email around 4:30 p.m. saying something to the effect of "he's been admitted to the hospital, with pneumonia, and an infection.. the next 24 hours are critical." 

I had a weird, bad feeling in my gut.  I talked to DH a few moment later, who had instantly decided that it was important for him to leave ASAP and I agreed totally.  The only question was whether or not I should join him. There were the obvious logistical challenges, of packing, and packing for a baby on top of that, and traveling with a baby, etc, etc... and ultimately - although I felt so strongly, more strongly than I can even explain that I should go too- it was decided that DH leave by himself, the moment I arrived home.  I ended up leaving work late, feeling that it was necessary to get some things wrapped up in case I was going to be out, and I arrived home about 30 minutes later than usual.  DH left instantly, already packed up, still in his clothes from work, and EH and I went about our night.

Around 9:30, as I was getting ready for bed, I talked to DH on the phone.  He was about 45 minutes away, and even though his brother felt that things were improving with his dad, the doctor's warned them not to be too optimistic.  Around 9:45 - a mere 15 minutes later - my phone rang again, and with a lump in my throat so thick I could barely say "hello," DH told me that his dad had died. 

.....

It happened that fast.

.....

The things you don't always think about with cancer and chemo drugs?  The way that those drugs can destroy your immune system, making even the most common virus a deadly infection.  Because really, when you're battling something as scary and enormous as cancer, who would want to think about the little things anyway?

I believe in gut instincts. I believe in first impressions.  Even if there is nothing there to validate them on, and I believe - quite firmly - that when I have a "feeling," it is often right.  I often wish - in fast, more often than not I often wish - that I was wrong.  This was so one of those times.  I had such a bad feeling about that 4:30 p.m. email. So much so that I wrapped up everything I could at work and told my boss that I might need to be out for a few days, at a critically busy time when - quite honestly - being off of the office wasn't acceptable.

Anyway, I got off of the phone with DH fairly quickly.  What could I possibly say?  What could I do to help take away that pain?  I knew - from cold, hard experience - that there really wasn't anything, I could say or do think or ask for that would help or make it any easier.

So I hung up the phone and sobbed. 

Some of the sobbing was for me - I loved DH's dad and I was sooo.. oh so sad that he was gone. I wasn't ready for it, and an ISTJ likes to be prepared.  An ISTJ does NOT like to be caught off guard, gut feeling or not.  Some of it was because of guilt - if I hadn't stayed at worked late to wrap things up, DH might have gotten there in time to say good-bye....

Some of it was for his dad's wife, who I know was not ready for this day yet either.  She is an eternal realistic but also an optimist, and a fighter to the core - and the hell to anyone who thought this wasn't a battle they couldn't beat together. 

But more so than anything else, my sadness was for DH.

How unfair is it that someone in their early thirties should have to go through the death of both of his parents within the span of 19 months?  How does someone - who has barely gotten over the death of his mom - suddenly deal with the death of his dad as well?

I won't even pretend to understand.  I have two healthy parents and it will likely be decades until I myself have to go through what he is going through now.

For me there are a thousands things that make me sad when I think about this loss, but there are two things that really sting, that really stab at me whenever I think about them....

The first is that is just happened way. too. fast.  I wasn't expecting it, I wasn't prepared, and I think - even  now - I still haven't fully processed. After spending months and months watching DH's mom slowly fade away, fighting as hard as she could but finally succumbing, I thought we would have that sort of warning - or least ANY sort of warning - with his dad. I thought and hoped that this would just be one of those "false alarms."

The second thing that breaks my heart is that even though EH got to know and meet DH's dad, he will not remember him other than through photographs or videos. And vice versa - DH's dad got to meet EH, but he won't get a chance to see all of the amazing things that he is going to become.  That just breaks me into a million pieces. 

We're talking about man who was born in the 1930's, had 6 children of his own and - at the time of his death - 8 (I think) grandchildren, and even so, I was always amazed by how much he loved his grand kids, and how comfortable he was holding them, even when they were teeny tiny babies.

The pictures that we have of EH and his Grandpa will be something that I will cherish forever, and I hope that DH and I are able to help EH know and love the multiple family members that he lost before he was even old enough to realize it...

In loving memory.... EH with his Grandpa

Some of the amazing things published about DH's dad after his death (I'm not sure how long these links will remain active, so I apologize if they're no longer working when you try them):
- Obituary (an incredibly impressive one, at that)
- A feature story, with interviews from his family
- "Our Take: White Roses and Thorns" - "ROSES: Posthumously, to Charles Hartman for his contributions to highway safety. The Lower Chanceford Township man died March 5 at 80."